10 years as a copywriter

3 years as a father

99th percentile in head circumference

874 times I’ve been told if I had one more x in my name, I could have worked in the adult film industry

Synthesizing complex topics into words that are safe for human consumption

Showing brands that humor can be their friend

Working with agency teams

Accidentally knocking things over while talking with my hands

Roasting myself because this type of exercise gives me great anxiety

Settling for safe and boring copy

Resisting the temptation of my son’s Magna-Tiles when in need of a creative break

Keeping a straight face on Zoom calls when phrases like “Share of Throat” are mentioned

Treading water

Unprotected ledges in high places

Writing in spreadsheets

Creative briefs that read like riddles

Never finishing this website

The ocean